It’s Not Right, But I Understand…

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BBCThis story: Man sold drugs to ‘pay for IVF’ on the BBC News website caught my eye and left me sympathetic toward the offending party.

His defender had this to say: “This is a most unusual case. The reason he committed the offences was to fund fertility treatment for his wife. He didn’t think before he acted and at its lowest level was extremely foolish.”

Not surprisingly, the man was sentenced to both a nine-month jail term (how ironic, no?) and community service.

Those of us who’ve had to pony up for the privilege of being poked, prodded, medicated and harvested know all too well how much the IVF drug portion alone costs — my protocol for one round of meds was $5,000. Throw in the doctor visits, ultrasounds, harvest, fertilization and transfer and assorted other grab bag items and you’re looking at a total of $16,000 or more for one round of IVF with absolutely no guarantee of success.

So, can you blame the guy for looking to fund the IVF anyway he could? I’m guessing a second job at minimum wage would have taken quite a bit longer to accumulate the funds. Now add an impatient wife tormented by babies, pregnant women and the like who’s vocalizing her unhappiness day and night, and he was probably willing to take any chance he could to get on with the IVF. When IVF is all out of pocket, as it was for us and so many others, the procedure and related meds needless to say makes a significant dent in the family finances.

Note to the fertile community: yes, yes, delivering and raising children is expensive, but tack on a few more years of trying and trying and trying with huge associated price tags.  Now do you begin to understand how frustrated we infertiles get when you moan about the cost and hardships of raising children? At least you conceived them free of charge and have them to brag on to your family and friends.

I can’t help but wonder: what in the world is this poor man’s wife going to do waiting another year or more to get things started…