Anyone out there remember playing the board game LIFE? It’s been years since I spun the wheel of fate, but during a visit with friends who have a seven-year-old daughter and nine- and 11-year-old sons I was invited to put a pink peg in a car and see what life had in store for me. On the living room floor […]» Read more
Serenity now! That’s the collective thought for most couples as they navigate through the holidays and try to keep infertility from becoming a buzz kill of the worst kind. There are more than a few givens that come with this season. One of them is that we’re about to be inundated with holiday tunes, which gave me the germ of […]» Read more
Updated to share two links revealing a reality different than what the conventional mom community experiences:
- Grown In My Heart, an adoption network, reviews Silent Sorority
- A Casting Call for Drew Barrymore, David Duchovny
Ack! What’s going on? If I were a conspiracy theorist, I’d be convinced we were in the midst of a well-coordinated, full-on assault against those who can’t or don’t have children.
You may recall the judgmental Orlando Sentinel Mom’s at Work blog I referenced in my last post. Who knew it was the tip of the iceberg?
This week Mika Brzezinski weighs in.
Mika, Mika, Mika…I really expected more from you. We’re contemporaries. I watched you tackle tough topics as a reporter, saw you anchor the weekend national
news. Did you really write not one but two posts all but arguing that children are
essential to fulfillment?
“Women face enough pressures and challenges in a workplace that is still depressingly biased against a female’s success. Add to that, the fact that the very thing many women I know find
most rewarding (having kids) is now frowned upon.”
Having kids is now frowned upon? Mika, you must be seriously distracted to have missed out of the whole mommy movement. Just check out Mom’s
Rising or Mom 2.0 Summit or the Motherhood Project or Maria
Shriver’s latest report, A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything. As Melanie Notkin points out in her editor’s note on Savvy Auntie the report weirdly overlooked the fact that not all women are mothers:
“The study, meant to change the way government policy and businesses modernize with the new standing of women in the economy – a change I completely support – interchanges the word
“woman” with “mother” so often it’s as if all women are mothers.”
…» Read more
It’s been a very long time since I sat in the Frieze Building on the University of Michigan campus taking notes in a women’s studies course. While I registered mainly for administrative reasons (the session fulfilled a requirement for my English Literature major), the class had the added benefit of being thought-provoking. One of the assigned books, Strong-Minded Women, remains […]» Read more
That’s a clue for my answer to some complex questions that came this weekend from Silent Sorority readers. The ideas and emotions contained in their questions were remarkably familiar — so
much so they could have come straight out of my own head a few years ago. I guess, by now, I shouldn’t be startled by the depth of the shared infertility experience. I’m sure they’ll evoke some deja
vu for you, too. The questions pose the ultimate test for infertiles who don’t succeed with treatment — overcoming anger and finding peace.
First came this email:
“I’ve been having a rough go of it lately and have been pretty messed up.It’s kind of the kick off of the fun family/kid centric holiday season and I know it’s always really hard for me.
Something you wrote about in your book and talk about at times is an issue that I’m dealing with. How did you move beyond the resentment of people who do have children? I absolutely hate
feeling this way. I’m even starting to resent my dr. and therapist, not good. I just see everyone with kids as having something I can’t, won’t. On some level, I understand it is the way it is
supposed to be. On the other hand, I just want to isolate myself from all those with kids. So frustrating,and impossible too! Does it just fade away?”
…» Read more