Hokey doke. Time for some ‘infertiles’ fun since I’ve been way too heavy and all buzz-kill of late. I bring you another “as a mom” laden story replaced with the requisite “as an infertile” and other contextual modifications. Enjoy!
Inferti-Nesia: When Infertiles Forget
‘Inferti-nesia,’ a term used by many infertiles to describe their worsening memory function as they shoot up more hormones, is – while not a medical condition – a symptom several infertiles told ABCNEWS.com cause them to leave husbands waiting in the sack and to forget dentist appointments.
ELiza Thomas, an infertile trying to conceive for four years, told ABCNEWS.com that she “can’t remember a darn thing anymore.”
“When I visit the doctor and they ask how I am or when my birthday is, I have to ask my husband,” said Thomas. “The more hormones you consume the less brain cells you’re left with at the end of the day.”
One Virginia infertile of seven years said that she knows “inferti-nesia” all too well.
“Basically, as an infertile you live in a haze and fog of forgetting the most ordinary things because you have many things pulling for your attention,” said Honey Keesey, founder of TotalInfertile.com.
Keesey told ABCNEWS.com that she once almost drove out her driveway to go to the library before she noticed that her injection-able was still waiting on the counter in the house.
“Fortunately the inject-able was fine and I didn’t pull out of the driveway,” said Keeley. “But I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve had the infamous cup of Raspberry Tea on the top of the car that just flies
off later during the trip.”
Dr. Jeffrey Baum, the director of the Alzheimer & Memory Center at the University of XXX Hospital and Medical Center, told ABCNEWS.com that it is an attention problem – more so than a memory one – that distracts infertiles from remembering.
“The bottom line is that distractions and inattention impacts memory, so that if you have a lot of hormones to track or you have a lot going on with the dildocam, your memory of certain things and your recall will be impacted,” said Baum.
And while Baum said that “inferti-nesia” isn’t a medical condition, it is true that the more distractions there are, and the more directions your attention is pulled in, the greater the effect on your memory function.
“Certainly the more years you’ve been trying to conceive the more distracted you will be,” said Baum.
Thomas said that she once left a syringe behind at church and remembers being rattled afterward but says now she can see how infertiles can make mistakes.
“Life gets crazy and you get carried away and things come up and you don’t mean to forget something important but I can see how it can happen,” said Thomas. “Life moves so fast when you’re trying to conceive. It is just exhausting to keep track of the calendar.
“We’ve never left an embryo behind. But I always wonder if we will.”
July 11, 2008 12:27 pm
So THAT explains it!!! ; )
July 11, 2008 1:17 pm
Written as it should have been all along!
July 11, 2008 3:19 pm
I love you, PJ! Brilliant, as usual. And that last line just kills me!
July 11, 2008 4:19 pm
HA HA HA H! Oh man- that is some excellent work there, m’dear.
brilliant!
July 12, 2008 12:00 am
Hah! Very funny. It’s hard out here for an infertile.
July 12, 2008 2:53 am
Now I finally understand why I kept stopping at green lights.
July 12, 2008 5:48 am
Aint it the truth, though?
Bea
July 12, 2008 9:59 pm
“… a lot going on with the dildocam…”
Story of my life right now. Sigh…
Funny as hell, as always! Would also love to see one of these about “struggling to lose the struggling-to-have-a-baby weight”…
July 13, 2008 11:23 am
I LOVE your blog!!!!
July 14, 2008 3:28 pm
OH, that is good, sister,that is GOOD!
July 24, 2008 3:33 pm
I enjoyed ready this very much!