Some remarkable milestones to report:
1) I was pea green with envy yesterday, but not for the usual reason (that’s right folks, pregnancy was not involved!) ….
2) A new work acquaintance asked me if I had children and my first instinct was not to throw something at him.
I think both episodes show signs of progress, yes? Okay, the details.
I’ve been working a few days a week at a really interesting startup where the only downside is that it requires 60-90 minutes of drive time each way. Since I abhor long, slow commutes I try to distract myself with NPR stories. Yesterday’s feature had me wrestling with the ugly green monster.
Why? The guest was a new author talking about her book chronicling her experience, at 37, to freeze her eggs. Ah, you say, you envy her the access to a new, promising reproductive technology? No actually, I envied her the slot she scored on NPR’s Talk of the Nation discussing her new book.
I laughed at the realization that I’d graduated from pregnancy envy to book envy. In each case I have had to work harder to get fewer results. You’ve got to admit the parallels are ironic. First, I couldn’t get pregnant while doing everything required and then some while everyone around me was getting knocked up right and left. And, now, at a time when I finally delivered my book about the hidden tolls of living in an era of designer babies and clinics marketing fertility for all, I’m reminded again that mainstream media has a fascination with making babies, but they’re less interested in what happens when all the whiz bang technology doesn’t deliver on its promise.
Now, for item numero dos. For years I avoided any and all social and work situations that might land me in the middle of small talk with new people. I was expert at the handshake and run. It was my way of self protection and a sure fire means of avoiding the evitable question about whether I had children. Yesterday I not only got the question, I answered it without my usual indignation at getting the query; it was completely in context (we were discussing dosing of medications from a pediatrician’s point of view). I answered it without feeling any malice whatsoever toward the man and continued with the conversation about the delicate nature of new drug therapies.
Now, if only I could get NPR to ask me about my experience not getting pregnant…